The US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention dropped new public guidelines for masks on Thursday, announcing that those who are fully vaccinated no longer need to wear them either indoors or outdoors, with some exceptions. The CDC did not say whether we have to get out of sweatpants or start showering again -- just two of many questions that remain unanswered as we inch toward a post-pandemic world.
Yet for all the lingering uncertainty, the CDC has clarified plenty, according to the internet. Here are some of the funnier responses to the news, which signifies a serious shift toward life feeling like it used to (and which also elicited plenty of serious questions, as well as concerns from high-risk people who worry some of the mask-free masses may not in fact be vaccinated).
Does the CDC have any advice about pants.
— Emily Nussbaum (@emilynussbaum) May 13, 2021
"The CDC clarifies that if you are fully vaccinated and no longer wearing a mask, you should still not talk on speaker phone in public," one Twitter user wrote.
The CDC clarifies that if you are fully vaccinated and no longer wearing a mask, you should still not talk on speaker phone in public
— joe (@JoePerticone) May 13, 2021
"The CDC says that fully vaccinated people can now go back to trying and failing to schedule regular in-person sessions of D&D," another shared.
the CDC says that fully vaccinated people can now go back to trying and failing to schedule regular in-person sessions of D&D
— Mel Stone (@melstonemusic) May 13, 2021
Wrote another, "The CDC says fully vaccinated people can now continue to listen to ambient music alone in their homes, thinking about the crushing weight of existence."
The CDC says fully vaccinated people can now continue to listen to ambient music alone in their homes, thinking about the crushing weight of existence
— Light In The Attic (@lightintheattic) May 13, 2021
The CDC says you can now be 3 feet apart but must remain emotionally distant
— harper-rosé (@HarperRoseD) May 11, 2021
According to the internet, you can also now wear jean shorts without being mocked by local teens. You can join the cast of Knives Out 2, pilot a giant Gundam robot and continue to "let time slowly ravage your body in this vast abyss." And you can keep buying new books even if you already have more unread books than any one person could possibly read in one lifetime. You are also allowed to stop doing the wave at baseball games. Freedom!
What a relief. The CDC has updated guidelines to say that men can wear jean shorts without being mocked by local teens
— Mark Agee (@MarkAgee) May 13, 2021
CDC says fully vaccinated people can join the cast of Knives Out 2
— ben wasserman (@benwassertweet) May 13, 2021
The CDC says fully vaccinated people can pilot a Gundam.
— νFinn (@PlamoDaddy) May 14, 2021
The CDC says fully vaccinated people can now continue to let time slowly ravage your body in this vast abyss.
— Doth (@DothTheDoth) May 13, 2021
The CDC says fully vaccinated people can keep buying new books even if they already have more unread books than any person could possibly read in one lifetime
— Molly Templeton (@mollytempleton) May 14, 2021
The CDC says you can now stop doing the wave at baseball games
— Rob Piersall (@RTPiersall) May 14, 2021
However, at least one Twitter user wants everyone to know the mandate against making small talk against her remains in place indefinitely.
the CDC said you can take your mask off once you're vaccinated, but the mandate against making small talk with me remains in effect indefinitely.
— molly conger (@socialistdogmom) May 13, 2021
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